"She said she didn't want to use the turkey baster method because it's unlikely to work and she found the idea of it demeaning. She said she would rather have sex with John the old-fashioned way. At times I've felt Jane was being flirty with John, so when I mentioned this, she accused me of making up excuses and imagining things."
"I think my question for the letter writer would be this: Let's say you win this debate because Jane relents and agrees to use the turkey baster method. At that point, how are you going to feel about trying to have a child with her, given that you think (with good reason) there's something, at least emotionally, going on between her and John"
A woman and her partner, Jane, disagree over how to conceive. Jane wants to use a mutual friend, John, as a sperm donor and prefers sexual intercourse rather than artificial insemination, which she finds demeaning and unlikely to work with a turkey baster. The other partner is uncomfortable with natural conception because of perceived flirtation between Jane and John and refuses consent. Financial limits make clinical insemination inaccessible. The disagreement over method, consent, trust, and lifelong involvement of the donor is causing significant relationship strain and raises questions about whether both partners actually want to become parents.
Read at Slate Magazine
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