The article emphasizes the importance of effective communication in relationships, highlighting the common conflict where one partner feels unheard. It points out that the initiator of a conversation may not clearly know what they need, with questions aiding in finding clarity. Men are often seen as wanting to 'fix' the situation, while women may just need to be listened to, illustrating a flaw in communication dynamics. Instead of jumping to solutions, partners should employ a simple technique to ask how they can be most helpful, fostering better understanding and avoiding conflict.
Stop trying to fix everything and just listen to me! In over 40 years of working with couples in psychotherapy, I canât count the number of times Iâve heard this.
Men often perceive women as 'too needy' or 'impossible to please.' They are puzzled because in their mind, they are listening, repeating exactly what she just said.
Many therapists mistakenly recommend that men put aside their instinct to 'fix' their partnerâs distress, but listening alone can sometimes fall short.
A surprisingly simple technique is to ask how you can be most helpful at the start of the conversation instead of jumping to solutions.
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