"Although honesty is the best policy in general, justice for Pinocchio, because it turns out sometimes lying is the only option. In certain situations, if you didn't smash the glass and break out an emergency fib, you'd simply be cruel. The secret to pulling it off in a way you can live with, as I've just learned, is in the branding."
"The soft no is not an out-and-out untruth, a complicated story with the potential to trip you up at a later date, it's nothing like its mean evil twin, the hard no. But it's also definitely not a yes. It's vague, slow, kicking it down the road, never firming up a date; shame, this week's not looking good. After an unknowable number of delays and obfuscations, hold your nerve long enough and you will eventually achieve the soft no."
Honesty is generally the best policy, but occasional, small falsehoods can spare people unnecessary pain. A person received an invitation from an acquaintance to meet one-on-one after a group hang. The person did not want to offend or invest time and money in an unpromising encounter. A friend suggested the 'soft no' as a gentle, noncommittal refusal that avoids cruelty and avoids a firm rejection. The soft no relies on vague delays and obfuscations, never firmly confirming plans. Persisting with evasions eventually dissolves the invitation into a polite, consequence-free decline.
Read at www.theguardian.com
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