"You know that friend who always texts back within seconds, no matter what time of day? I used to be that person. My phone would buzz, and before I'd even consciously registered the notification, my thumbs were already typing. It took me years to realize that my lightning-fast response time wasn't just about being helpful or friendly. It was broadcasting something much deeper about my relationship with boundaries."
"I discovered this the hard way when I realized my worst mental health days often correlated with too much time bouncing between work Slack and Twitter, responding to every ping like my life depended on it. Research from the University of California, Irvine found that it takes an average of 23 minutes to fully refocus after an interruption. Yet many of us treat every text like an emergency that demands immediate attention."
Immediate responses to messages often broadcast constant availability and weaken personal boundaries. Quick replying habits can stem from anxiety about appearing rude or unhelpful. Frequent interruptions from texts and work notifications impair focus and correlate with worse mental health. Research from the University of California, Irvine finds that it takes an average of 23 minutes to fully refocus after an interruption. Deliberately delaying responses—for example, waiting 30 minutes—allows people to finish tasks and protect attention. Using busyness or constant availability as a defense can prevent facing vulnerability. Pausing strategically helps reclaim time, reduce stress, and reinforce boundaries.
Read at Silicon Canals
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